Welcome to the Circus

I'm living under the big top, with each child running their own ring, and me trying to orchestrate the whole show. I sometimes feel I am failing miserably and am calling for the folks who paid for their tickets to come back.
"I swear, I'll get the hang of it! Just give me a minute or twelve to figure out what the hell is going on!"

My brain feels jumbled with appointments I forgot to immediately put into my blackberry (isn't that after all, why I got it in the first place?) and with paper work that needs to be turned in, and school supplies I haven't bought yet. I mean at this point lets be thankful the boys are old enough to dress themselves because I may have sent them on the bus without pants.

I feel so very behind on the game right now. How does Octomom do it? How does Kate Gosselin do it? How do those ever expanding Duggars do it? (Okay, that is my extent of large famous family knowledge.)

I think they all have help. Okay I KNOW they all have help. Why don't I have help? I need another woman's brain. One specifically there to remember things for me. Maybe she can mop the floors too, okay and put away the laundry that is sitting folded in the baskets for the second week straight. Maybe I'll talk to Nathan about bringing in a second wife. I mean, that's cool now that HBO says so, right?

I've procrastinated enough for today. Thanks for encouraging that.

The San Francisco Treat

Ah San Francisco. You were a whirlwind of fun and activity. Here is my trip, in a time line, because folks, it was so packed, that is the best way to give it to you.

Friday August 13, 2010 1:00pm: Get to my mom's house. Eat pizza. First real meal I have eaten in two days. Get horrible anxiety.

1:30pm: arrive at Logan Express terminal. Cry to an old Chinese man on the bus about leaving the kids and my fear of flying. He is oddly comforting.

1:45pm: arrive at airport. Debate taking my anti-anxiety meds after I throw up all of the pizza I just consumed. Convince myself to wait a little longer.

2:45pm: Spot Honest Tea Just a Tad Sweet in the kiosk by terminal. Decide that is a sign from above to take my anti-anxiety pill. Thank Leah and Victoria for keeping up with my neurotic text messages for the past couple of hours.

3:00pm: Leave Boston

4:40 pm: Land in NYC, rush to new gate, boarding has just begun. Call mom, Brody is crying. I cry.
5:00pm: Depart NYC. Try to sleep. Can't sleep. Can't stop looking at the man or woman across the aisle from me. At first glance I thought it was a woman, but since then I have noticed the body hair covering the person, and the definite man feet, but with nail polish. I am too confused to sleep.

9:04pm Pacific time: Land in San Francisco. Rush to nearest airport bathroom. Suffering from intense migraine. Get changed into rehearsal dinner clothes and pray for migraine to go away.
9:15pm: Wait in cold for taxi. Think about how strange it is to be cold. Thank God I brought a light jacket.

10:00pm: Get to rehearsal dinner. Missed the dinner. Happy to see Nathan and everyone else. Decide to chug water to help ease migraine, which has already started to fade. Decide the plane rides were to blame.











Midnight: Leave rehearsal dinner spot, tell Nathan I am famished. Spot a hole in the wall Mexican joint that advertises best vegetarian burritos in San Fran. SCORE! It is heaven in my mouth. I toss the tortilla chips and salsa though because I was a bit scared of how my stomach would react. Head to The Elbow Room (a bar) for after rehearsal dinner party. (I do not know why this is underlined and give up on trying to fix it.)


Saturday August 14, 2010 2:00am: Arrive in apartment rented for the stay. It's really cute. Climb into bed. Wonder how the kids are.

7:13am: Wake up. Immediately call the kids. They are all doing great. Keira has done exceptionally well. I feel instantly better and awake and ready to start the day. Nathan decides to sleep a bit longer. I take a shower, and wake up Meryl.

9:30am: Meryl and I do some last minute things for the wedding. Iron the table runners.

11:00am: Do some sight seeing. We have limited time, but want to buy the kids a gift and I have convinced everyone that I will die without eating In N Out. We go to Fisherman's Wharf, walk around, buy necklaces for the kids, Nathan gets stopped by a man who gives him a sticker for not smiling, see Alcatraz, see the sea lions, Nathan gets pooped on by a sea gull, we eat In N Out (grilled cheese animal style and fries for me, which is a grilled cheese with all the stuff they put on a burger... still no meat) sun comes out, we head back to apt to get ready for wedding.










2:00pm: Walk to Safeway with Meryl and Kim for some wine, champagne, OJ, and some other little things. We stayed right outside the Castro area of San Fran. It is really cool walking around.

3:00pm: My maturity level has dropped quickly. I make Meryl stand in the middle of the street to pose for a picture. We then take turns looking like drunk bums with our wine/champagne wrapped in paper bags. Classy. Head inside to get ready, help each other do our hair, and drink mimosas.



4:45pm: Head to wedding site (Swedish American Hall) It is walking distance. Thank god Kim brought flip flops. Paris Hilton, your shoes are cute, but are a bitch to walk in.

5:00pm: Set up last minute stuff for wedding. Brandie arrives. Time to begin!!! So excited!
5:15pm: Make Jim, who is walking with me down the aisle, promise to walk slow. I am scared of my shoes.

5:20pm: watch Brandie walk down the aisle. She is stunning, to say the very least. This is a very cool wedding. There are freaking goldfish in the cake. Well a layer/goldfish tank in the middle of it. And lots of candy, which is always a good thing.



5:45pm: What a wedding! It was original and emotional and wonderful. Take pictures.

6:20pm: Find out I, along with the bridesmaids will be singing "Jesse" by Carly Simon in front of everyone at the wedding. Kim captures my reaction on her camera.

6:23pm: Chug current wine, Kim and Meryl instantly get me a new glass. We all decide drinking as much as possible is the answer to singing in front of everyone.

6:40pm: Wedding party is announced one at a time to songs chosen by Jesse and Brandie. We don't find out the song until we walk out. I walk out to Paparazzi by Lady Gaga (because I am an actress) I stand in front of everyone and curtsy . Wine must be kicking in.

7:00pm: Lots of fun. Groomsman and Groom sing "Brandie" to Brandie. They go first and actually do a semi good job. I think this may be do-able.

7:10pm: Bridesmaids and Bride and mother of the groom sing. I am pretty sure we make no sense. I can't even hear the music. I have no idea what part of the song we're at. I just know when the chorus comes I sing "Jesse" really loud. I laugh. We all laugh. A lot.

8 or 9pm: I have no idea what time it is. I have no idea how many glasses of wine I've had. The effects of not nursing Keira for so long have taken effect. I tell certain people (Kim, Meryl, Nathan) that I am changing my name to NWOWW (because my boobs resemble JWOWW from Jersey Shore.) I must have had more wine than I thought.

who knows pm: Who is even getting me wine? I have not gone to the bar once all night. Clearly I still remember to keep my pinky up while drinking and dancing. Always a lady.



9:50pm: I am now singing "Don't Stop Believin' by Journey into a microphone in front of everyone. Clearly I no longer care about singing in front of people. Thankfully I am not alone doing this. Brandie's sisters Cate and Liz are also singing. I am having fun. Why don't I drink? I am a fun drunk!
10 something pm: Wedding is over. We broke everything down. The San Francisco Fire House is on the walk back to the apartment. Kim thinks it's a good idea to go inside and take a picture. My inebriated brain thinks that sounds like a fantastic idea. We run when we hear voices.

11pm: There is fun crevice outside of the apartment. I think it is a fun place to take a picture. I hate Paris Hilton for making such cute unwearable shoes. I have permanent loss of feeling in two toes on each foot. I hate the saying beauty is pain.



Midnight- 3:00am: Get changed and go to Clift Hotel for the wedding afterparty. It is a cool bar/club. I decide water is the way to for the rest of the night. The loud pulse of the music makes me feel sick. I sober up surprisingly fast. I am in love with the enormous chair in the hotel. I feel like a doll, or the incredible shrinking woman. I want a large chair in my house. We stay until the bar closes. We arrive back to the apartment. Set alarms, pass out.

Sunday August 15, 2010, 7:30am: Wake up. Do last minute packing. Call taxi.

8:15am: leave for airport.

8:45am: stand next to Zooey Deschanel in security line at the airport. She is little and cute and exactly like I pictured she would be. She has on Ray Ban type sunglasses. I want a pair.

9:30am: Get yogurt and a bagel at the airport. Board plane.

10:05am: Goodbye San Francisco. It was fun.

6:09pm Eastern Time: Arrive in Boston one hour early. Wait for mom to pick us up. Can not wait to see the kids. Keira doesn't like me for about an hour. She is furious with me. It makes me sad.

8:00pm: snuggle with kids and feel grateful for them, my mom for taking good care of them, Nathan's fam for the trip, and life in general.

WHAT A TRIP!

A Jumbled Brain

Okay, I know I have spent many-a post promising photos and more in depth updates. Its just that we've been so busy y'all!!! (I know I've been saying that a lot too, but darn it, it's true!)
Here are a few little things I'd like to get out of my head... think of it as a end of summer cleaning. As you all know by now there's a whole little universe in my head, and the man that was just elected leader (after the masses overthrew that last guy for letting me go too many places with zero make-up, pshhh like that was okay) decided it was too cluttered and these bits of randomness need to go.
Are you still with me?
Okay.

My children are switching their idol worshiping of Michael Jackson to idol worshiping of Eminem.
Thank you MJ for teaching my kids that prescription drugs can kill you. There have been some wonderful anti drug debates because of this. Thank you also for the endless amount of times I have to say "crotch grabbing is only cool when Michael Jackson does it. You'll get arrested if you keep doing that in public. It's called lewd behavior." Also thank you for teaching my kids to (sort-of) moonwalk and to do the Thriller dance, and sing all of your songs because those things have supplied me, and anyone who would watch them hours of entertainment. (Dude, have you seen Nate sing Billy Jean?)
So far Eminem you have also picked up on the anti drug issue, right where MJ left off. You however have gotten yourself clean (which is just great to hear 5 and 9 year olds say) You have also taught my kids about domestic violence and its consequences. My kids jump at the chance to tell the tale about your poor upbringing, how you hate your dad, about your little sister, about Kim, Hailey, oh and that in the video for Stan, it is just an actor that looks like you, and he's kind of obsessed, like a stalker. Thanks for teaching my kids about stalkers. It has been interesting that you, Eminem have sort of a God-like way of teaching some things. Yesterday while in the car we were having a deep, meaningful discussion. Ty was debating the topic of past lives and if you would know if you were repeating things and how sad it would be to not remember if you had a really cool past life, when my dear Nate piped up and said "Ty, remember what Eminem says, you only have ONE shot, ONE opportunity..." If you do not know to which Eminem song I am referring to, then you need a quick lesson on Marshall Mathers aka Slim Shady aka Slim aka Eminem and I suggest you see 8 Mile. The song is the "theme song" if you will.
Thank you Eminem for also keeping me on my toes and searching for your "radio edited" songs. Because THAT'S fun to do, and for making sure I do not fill in the blanks to the parts edited.
Also thank you for making me cool again in my kids eyes because I have seen Eminem in concert. I had lost much respect when I neglected to ever travel far or pay $504,987 to see Michael Jackson in concert. (I only redeemed this by saying I saw Janet Jackson in concert, but the damage was done by then.)

While I am on a kick of letting you know what a wonderful parent I have become, I should also tell you that I have taught Keira do do the little shoulder dance that Jay-Z does in the video for the song "Big Pimpin". I have not shown her, or any of the other kids the video, so be happy about that.

Brody refers to most of us as "Baby" now, so that's fun. It is always a good time when a two year old can say "Hey baby." Next up, we'll be teaching him to say "How you doin'?"

Was that enough brain vomit for you today? Because I feel like I need a shower.

Mr Roboto

Here is where I am grateful for the chance to record things about my kids that make me smile.
Today I made my kids walk, and walk, and then walk some more.
I have been on a "teach thing to the kids that I want them to soak into their core being to be a wonderful adult" kick (is it bad I am calling this a kick? I mean I guess I do that every day, but I am more aware of these life lessons as of late.) I have been teaching the kids about the importance of walking places, if you can, and why cars contribute to pollution. Suffice to say we have been doing a lot of walking lately (so I don't eat my own words, because you know, kids will be the first to call you out on that stuff.) During our walks we've been having deep conversations.
I have been trying to instill a sense of adventure that they will carry on to adult hood. I tell them that when they grow up, I hope they will always rather go for a walk, or get out of the house and experience life, rather than being one of those guys too wrapped up in a game, or something on t.v. to do anything. I tell them their girlfriends/wives will be grateful for that trait one day.
Today I asked them what they thought their future girlfriends would look like. Ty said he thought she'd have brown or maybe black hair, and then added, he wasn't quite so sure how great black hair would look as she got older though. Nate said she would have yellow hair like him. Ty then added that whoever his future wife was, she would have to be very understanding of his schedule, because he would be traveling a lot for baseball, so she would either have to come with him, or stay at home with the kids, which he knows is hard, (he then added a right mommy?)
Nate said he was going to be an inventor and he was going to build robots for the army to use. He later told me one of his robots would pick up grenades when the bad guys threw them, and the robot would throw it back so it would explode on their side. I told Nate that Boston had one of the best schools in the world for people who want to build robots (MIT) and he better make sure he pays attention and do well in school so he can get into MIT one day. He told me he knew that and he was going to get a scholarship. (Now THAT was music to my mother of four children who all think college is mandatory and not a choice's ears.)
Each day I have been pushing the kids to walk a bit further than the last. I am enjoying this time together, and all of the wonderful conversations and memories that are coming out of it.

I am in the process of planning Nate's 6th birthday party, and want to poll my readers. We have decided on a carnival theme, and are going to set up various booth throughout the yard. Any suggestions for booths?
So far we have come up with:

• face painting
• football toss
• soccer kick
• hockey-slap shot
• bean bag toss
• fishing station

I'd love to hear your great ideas and input here!
Kindergarten is the last family/friends combined party we host for the kids, and we like to go out with a bang! Thanks in advance for all of your help.

I didn't mean to!

We're back! I had the most unbelievable time in San Francisco this weekend. I have so much to write about, once I have composed myself and have caught up on the exhaustion, which is finally hitting me.
I do want to share this though, because it made me laugh. As I have said before, sometimes I give dirty looks. They are totally unintentional, and they get me into a LOT of trouble.
This photo is case and point. My memories of the wedding were nothing but happy, fun, dancing, laughing, sometimes so hard that I cried.
Apparently I took a brief moment to look like a total bitch though. Here is that moment, captured.
And here I am, showing you. This was probably within minutes of me singing "Don't Stop Believin'" by Journey into a microphone, with the bride's two sisters, if that is any sort of reference to my absolutely non bitchy mood.
Always a class act.

The Ecotarium

My family, mother and brother recently took a trip to The Ecotarium in Worcester, Ma.We had never been there before, but had heard nothing but great things. Turns out, every great thing was so very true.It can be difficult to find a place that holds interest through all of my children's ages. This wonderful place certainly did that and then some. You purchase tickets directly upon entering the gate. My mom used the purchase of the tickets and applied it towards a membership. Here's an amazing fact: A membership at the Ecotarium can also get you in to the Museum of Science in Boston, The Children's Museum in Boston, the Roger Williams Zoo in Providence, RI, and those are just to name a few. Even better? A membership to The Ecotarium is actually less expensive than a membership to any of the above mentioned places! You can't beat that logic!One of the things I loved the most about this place, is that it has both indoor and outdoor activities.We began our visit indoors, where there were various exhibits, typical to those in science museums, there were a surprising amount of animals shown in various habitats, and gratefully there was a toddler-preschool play area.For children age 7 and up The Ecotarium offers a Tree Canopy Tour. Tyler loved this. The tour has you walking up high in the tree tops through bridges and you are able to see things at a whole new perspective. The tour ends with a zip line to the ground again, which is undoubtedly the highlight of this particular adventure.There are a few wonderful nature paths at The Ecotarium, each with a different theme. These were both fun and interesting, and not too long for little legs to walk on their own.
Throughout The Ecotarium there are animals to watch. All of the animals living there have been rescued and could not survive in the wild on their own.My boys loved reading the lists of food given to the animals (which is always posted.) We particularly loved the polar bear, the snakes and turtles, and my personal favorite, the river otters. We were able to watch the river otters get fed their daily fish and blueberry popsicle.We ate lunch in the huge picnic area. We chose to pack our lunches, but there is a food stand if you would like to purchase your own food.There is a large playground adjacent to the picnic area which the kids loved as well.My two year old Brody's favorite part of the trip was the train ride. The Ecotarium has a miniature steam train that goes throughout The Ecotarium, complete with a little tunnel, which the conductor highly encouraged all aboard to be as loud as they could while traveling through.To end our trip we spent a large chunk of time in the bubble station, which is outdoors, and thankfully so. There were bubble makers of every shape and size. It was very comparable to the bubble room in the Childrens Museum of Boston. I personally enjoyed it much more outside though, because it gave the kids (and me) more room to move around and make bigger bubbles.
We spent the whole day at The Ecotarium, and could have spent a bit more time there still. I could not recommend this place more. It was a fantastic break from the norm for us.
I'd love to hear about your thoughts on this place if you have gone!