Day 30, In rememberance.

It has been thirty days since I made a deeply conscious decision to live out my days to their absolute fullest.
I will now tell you why.

Two weeks prior to Nate's birthday, our family's world was shaken to it's core. My mother in law was diagnosed with stage four cancer. She had fought breast cancer twice already in her life, and came out triumphant both times.
This time the bad news about the extent of how far the cancer had spread and complications from the cancer seemed to just get worse with each day.
Sharon was admitted into the hospital about four weeks ago, and she unfortunately never returned home.
I am saddened to say she lost her battle with this horrible disease.
Sharon passed away today, Monday November 15, 2010.
She was 56 years young.


Dear Sharon,
I am still in a state of shock over this all. It all happened so quickly. There is so much to say, and it is hard to know where to begin.
For the past eight years our relationship has grown, blossomed, changed, and at times has been rocky. Although as far as a mother in law goes, I think it has been better than most.
I have seen your love for your family, and Sharon, there is no one in this world that could ever doubt that. You gave them everything you could, you loved them unconditionally, you were a friend to them, and a comfort to them when they needed it most. When I was having a trying day with my own kids, you would always say "oh honey I have been there, I know exactly what you are going through."
And the thing is Sharon, I knew that you did know exactly what I was going through. Because you made it through those trying years of raising three boys and a girl, you always gave me the confidence that I too will make it through.
You taught me many things. You taught me to garden, and to sew. You taught me little household remedies. You lent your cooking expertise more times than I could count.
You provided for our family in more ways than I could ever possibly say, and I hope you always felt that gratitude.
Sharon you were an example at enjoying life. Your parties were always filled with laughter and love, and boy did you know how to throw a party! If one were to take a snapshot of you during one of your many festivities, I would say it would be you, surrounded by friends, a glass of wine in hand, and a big smile on your face.
Sharon, I want you to know, I will make sure your grandchildren will always know you, and know how much you love them.
You treated Tyler like one of your own grandchildren from the very beginning. That is something I am forever grateful for. He never felt anything but love and acceptance from you. he loved talking to you about sports. He will miss his Nana so very much.
I know how much Nate reminded you of Nathan. He loves you more than you know. He looked forward to your special dates with him. He loved playing checkers and dominoes with you, and hearing all of your funny jokes and stories.
Even though Brody is young, he misses you already. I am so glad Brody was able to have special time with you, and have sleepovers with you. I will always think of him giggling with you, and the way you looked at him like he was a beautiful gift.
Oh and Keira. Sharon I am so so so glad you were able to meet your only granddaughter. Keira knows you. She has been kissing your picture every night. She will have so many beautiful things that we can tell her you brought her from some wonderful place you traveled to. And she thankfully inherited your gorgeous skin color, a wonderful gift you gave her right there!
Sharon, that is the hardest part for me. I am sad you won't be there to celebrate those large milestones with your grandchildren. You were a wonderful Nana, and I mourn for the children, and the absence that will be felt during those times. I know you will be looking down, smiling though. I know you are and will continue to be so proud of them.
I am sad you will not be able to be a part of my wedding. I know, again you will be there in spirit, but it was something I looked forward to planning with you. I know how excited you were for it.
Sharon, you leave behind so many people whose lives you have touched deeply. You are one of a kind.
I have never seen two people more in love than you and Bob. You two embodied the term soul mates. Your love and devotion to each other is something every person strives for, but few actually obtain. I know those around you two were well aware of just how special your relationship was. Though you may not have been aware, he was by your side to the very end, Sharon.
Nathan writes to you every day. I am sure you now know that. You were his world Sharon. A son could not love his mother more than Nathan loves you.
Sharon, you were taken from this world too soon. That feeling of injustice will more than likely remain for quite some time. But we know. I know, you are finally at peace. You are with your dad, and you are no longer in pain. You are smiling down on us all, and watching over us. I know you will still be present, and will find a way to comfort your loved ones even now. I will see you in every beautiful garden, in your children, and in your grandchildren.
You may be gone from this world, but Sharon, you will not be forgotten.
You have left quite a footprint.
I love you, may you rest in peace.

It has been thirty days since I made a deeply conscious decision to live out my days to their absolute fullest. I will now tell you why. Two weeks prior to Nate's birthday, our family's world was shaken to it's core. My mother in law was diagnosed with stage four cancer. She had fought breast cancer twice already in her life, and came out triumphant both times. This time the bad news about the extent of how far the cancer had spread and complications from the cancer seemed to just get worse with each day. Sharon was admitted into the hospital about four weeks ago, and she unfortunately never returned home. I am saddened to say she lost her battle with this horrible disease. Sharon passed away today, Monday November 15, 2010. She was 56 years young. Dear Sharon, I am still in a state of shock over this all. It all happened so quickly. There is so much to say, and it is hard to know where to begin. For the past eight years our relationship has grown, blossomed, changed, and at times has been rocky. Although as far as a mother in law goes, I think it has been better than most. I have seen your love for your family, and Sharon, there is no one in this world that could ever doubt that. You gave them everything you could, you loved them unconditionally, you were a friend to them, and a comfort to them when they needed it most. When I was having a trying day with my own kids, you would always say "oh honey I have been there, I know exactly what you are going through." And the thing is Sharon, I knew that you did know exactly what I was going through. Because you made it through those trying years of raising three boys and a girl, you always gave me the confidence that I too will make it through. You taught me many things. You taught me to garden, and to sew. You taught me little household remedies. You lent your cooking expertise more times than I could count. You provided for our family in more ways than I could ever possibly say, and I hope you always felt that gratitude. Sharon you were an example at enjoying life. Your parties were always filled with laughter and love, and boy did you know how to throw a party! If one were to take a snapshot of you during one of your many festivities, I would say it would be you, surrounded by friends, a glass of wine in hand, and a big smile on your face. Sharon, I want you to know, I will make sure your grandchildren will always know you, and know how much you love them. You treated Tyler like one of your own grandchildren from the very beginning. That is something I am forever grateful for. He never felt anything but love and acceptance from you. he loved talking to you about sports. He will miss his Nana so very much. I know how much Nate reminded you of Nathan. He loves you more than you know. He looked forward to your special dates with him. He loved playing checkers and dominoes with you, and hearing all of your funny jokes and stories. Even though Brody is young, he misses you already. I am so glad Brody was able to have special time with you, and have sleepovers with you. I will always think of him giggling with you, and the way you looked at him like he was a beautiful gift. Oh and Keira. Sharon I am so so so glad you were able to meet your only granddaughter. Keira knows you. She has been kissing your picture every night. She will have so many beautiful things that we can tell her you brought her from some wonderful place you traveled to. And she thankfully inherited your gorgeous skin color, a wonderful gift you gave her right there! Sharon, that is the hardest part for me. I am sad you won't be there to celebrate those large milestones with your grandchildren. You were a wonderful Nana, and I mourn for the children, and the absence that will be felt during those times. I know you will be looking down, smiling though. I know you are and will continue to be so proud of them. I am sad you will not be able to be a part of my wedding. I know, again you will be there in spirit, but it was something I looked forward to planning with you. I know how excited you were for it. Sharon, you leave behind so many people whose lives you have touched deeply. You are one of a kind. I have never seen two people more in love than you and Bob. You two embodied the term soul mates. Your love and devotion to each other is something every person strives for, but few actually obtain. I know those around you two were well aware of just how special your relationship was. Though you may not have been aware, he was by your side to the very end, Sharon. Nathan writes to you every day. I am sure you now know that. You were his world Sharon. A son could not love his mother more than Nathan loves you. Sharon, you were taken from this world too soon. That feeling of injustice will more than likely remain for quite some time. But we know. I know, you are finally at peace. You are with your dad, and you are no longer in pain. You are smiling down on us all, and watching over us. I know you will still be present, and will find a way to comfort your loved ones even now. I will see you in every beautiful garden, in your children, and in your grandchildren. You may be gone from this world, but Sharon, you will not be forgotten. You have left quite a footprint. I love you, may you rest in peace.